The Myth of "Forgive and Forget" – Exposing the Enemy's Lie

We’ve all heard the saying "forgive and forget." It’s a common piece of advice given to those who are trying to heal from hurt. But have you ever stopped to think about where this concept truly comes from? Could it be that the world has been misled into believing that we must forget in order to truly forgive? God has shown me that this myth isn’t just a simple misunderstanding—it’s a scheme of the enemy, Satan, who knows just how powerful our testimony can be. And he will do everything he can to keep us from sharing it.

Let’s start with a powerful verse: Revelation 12:11. It says, “And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and the word of their testimony.” The "him" in this verse is referring to Satan, the enemy of our soul. And why is he trying to silence our testimony? Because the enemy knows that there is great power in our story—our testimony of how God has brought us through the darkest places in life. It’s by the blood of Jesus and the power of our testimony that we overcome.

The Enemy’s Lie: "Forget Everything"

The enemy, in his crafty way, has managed to get the world to believe that in order to forgive, we must forget. This is a dangerous lie, because when we are told that we must forget, it leads to a cycle of shame. If we remember the pain, the enemy convinces us that we’re doing something wrong—that we haven’t truly forgiven. This thought can hold us captive, making us feel guilty for feeling hurt or for remembering the things that have wounded us. The truth is, our memories are part of who we are. We don’t have to erase them to forgive, and doing so doesn’t make us any less righteous or healed. In fact, forgetting can actually prevent us from walking in the fullness of healing that God has for us.

God’s Invitation to Remember

In Micah 7:19, we see that God casts our sins into the sea, but that doesn’t mean we forget everything. God invites us to remember—specifically, He asks us to remember the ways He has shown His faithfulness in our lives. This is not a call to live in the past, but a call to recall His goodness in the midst of our pain, so that we can use it for His glory. When we forget the pain entirely, we lose our testimony, and without that testimony, we cannot share the victory that God has given us.

The Bible is full of instructions to remember—God wants us to recall His works, His deliverance, and His healing. Deuteronomy 8:2 says, “And you shall remember that the Lord your God led you all the way these forty years in the wilderness...” Remembering allows us to see God’s faithfulness, even in the midst of trials.

The Power of Our Testimony

Revelation 12:11 reveals that the enemy is overcome by the blood of the Lamb and the word of our testimony. Our testimony is powerful because it bears witness to the life-changing power of Jesus Christ. When we remember what God has done for us—how He healed us, restored us, and gave us victory over the enemy—it’s no longer just our story; it’s a declaration of God’s glory.

The enemy works tirelessly to keep us from sharing our testimony because he knows that when we speak of God's faithfulness, it brings light into the darkness. When we share how God has turned our pain into purpose, we defeat the lies of the enemy. This is why he encourages the myth of "forgive and forget"—because if we forget, we can never use our story to bring others out of darkness.

Breaking the Shame Cycle

Here’s the catch: When we buy into the lie that we must forget, we inadvertently create a cycle of shame. We feel ashamed for remembering our past, for feeling hurt, for experiencing emotions that might seem “unforgiving.” But this is not the truth. God never intended for us to forget our struggles, but rather to allow Him to redeem them. When we remember and share how He has transformed our pain, we are able to heal, and we give others the opportunity to heal as well.

God doesn’t ask us to erase our memories or pretend the pain didn’t happen. He asks us to bring them to Him, to allow Him to redeem those memories and use them for His glory. Our testimony is not about reliving the pain—it’s about showing how God’s grace and mercy have triumphed over it.

A Call to Remember with Purpose

So, what do we do with our memories? We remember with purpose. We remember how God has brought us through and how He continues to work in our lives. We remember so we can share that testimony with others. By doing so, we break the shame cycle and rise above the enemy’s lies.

One way we can remember is by creating “remembrance stones,” just as the Israelites did in the Old Testament. These stones served as physical reminders of God's faithfulness, and we can do the same by journaling, creating artwork, or even speaking our testimony aloud. Each time we share our story, we invite others into our healing process, and God is glorified through our journey.

Embrace Your Story

Don’t buy into the enemy’s lie that you must forget everything in order to truly forgive. Your memory, your testimony, is a powerful tool that God can use to bring healing to others. When you share your story, you bring light into darkness, and you overcome the enemy by the blood of the Lamb and the word of your testimony.

Remembering doesn’t make you stuck in the past—it allows you to see how far God has brought you. It’s through your testimony that others find hope and healing. So, embrace your story, let God redeem your memories, and use them to share the victory He has won for you. In doing so, you not only overcome the enemy’s lies, but you also help others do the same, which I pray that you do, in Jesus mighty name, amen!